Friday, December 04, 2009

How to get to work...

I now have a 'commute' in order to get from my house to the office each morning. It has become more complicated recently so I thought I would detail it in case you are ever trying to find my house:

1) Let the guard open the gate.
2) Wait for guard to remove puppy from beneath tires and keep him from running out open gate. (dumb dog)
3) Proceed with caution to avoid hitting other vehicles and/or school children who linger outside gate.
4) Turn left and proceed until the dirt track becomes a dirt football pitch.
5) Drive diagonally along the football pitch until it dead ends on a dirt road.
6) Wait for any SPLA vehicles driving out to their base as they contain men with a lot of guns.
7) Angle vehicle onto dirt road to avoid jarring bump.
8) Avoid mattatoos, people out brushing their teeth, water trucks, septic trucks, and school children.
9) Upon arriving at the large tire go right and proceed up over giant mound of dirt.
10) Drive on the right side of the newly tarmacked road, past the ministries.
11) Bear left and drive on the wrong side of the newly tarmacked road until you reach an unmarked dirt road. Turn left.
12) Drive past the USAID compound.
13) Look for a nondescript pharmacy that looks like all other small, roadside stores. Turn right on unmarked dirt road.
14) Pass the store that sells yogurt and cinammon rolls.
15) Proceed through mind-joggling ruts, bumps and puddles.
16) Bear right after the largest puddle and proceed up bumpy, unmarked dirt road.
17) Reaching the unmarked red gates turn left.

You've made it! (can everyone see now why I might need coffee before attempting to drive to work!)